At What Price Love
The divorce rate is at about 50% in the US. Of the remaining 50%, there is at least one person unhappy in their chosen union, yet they stay. Let’s say there’s 25% of marriages that at least one person is unhappy…at what price love?
I think it’s staggering to think that only approximately 25% of marriages are happy unions. It begs the question, why?
Don’t we decide to get married to another because we love our mate? Or are there other things at play? If you follow Oprah (the relationship guru and staunch unmarried), her team believes that people are attracted to people who will help them grow and address personal issues in order to discover their life’s path (or something like that…don’t quote me!)
If that’s true, then what happens when you have checked off that particular goal? And can you accomplish this without marrying? Can’t you just be together so that you can learn this particular life’s lesson without an attorney’s assistance 1, 3, 7 years later?
So, at what price love? What are you willing to ‘pay’ for love…and please don’t confuse my question with sophomoric humor. It’s something we all need to think about BEFORE we travel down that aisle and link lives with a virtual stranger (as you can’t truly know someone until you live with them, and yes, this assumes that you haven’t lived with one another until after marriage, an ancient concept that is losing steam).
The first question that needs to be asked and answered honestly is: Do I love myself?
Until you honestly love yourself and accept every imperfection as perfection, you need to stay away from all aisles not found in grocery stores. You’re not in a position to marry. No one says that when young, starry-eyed kids/children/young adults/old adults announce that they are getting married. This is non-negotiable, and you should pay through the nose until you accomplish this goal. You can’t fully love another until you love yourself.
There are no general classes for sharing lives with others. Not that I know of, other than some religious based classes, but I can’t comment on them, as I haven’t engaged. I think there should be some curriculum that addresses the idea of self-esteem, being a part of a marriage/team/relationship. Just my thoughts as I end my tour of duty working with children 6th thru 11th grade. What I’ve seen has been staggering, enlightening and humbling. I think it's worth paying for sooner rather than later.
Your thoughts?
I think it’s staggering to think that only approximately 25% of marriages are happy unions. It begs the question, why?
Don’t we decide to get married to another because we love our mate? Or are there other things at play? If you follow Oprah (the relationship guru and staunch unmarried), her team believes that people are attracted to people who will help them grow and address personal issues in order to discover their life’s path (or something like that…don’t quote me!)
If that’s true, then what happens when you have checked off that particular goal? And can you accomplish this without marrying? Can’t you just be together so that you can learn this particular life’s lesson without an attorney’s assistance 1, 3, 7 years later?
So, at what price love? What are you willing to ‘pay’ for love…and please don’t confuse my question with sophomoric humor. It’s something we all need to think about BEFORE we travel down that aisle and link lives with a virtual stranger (as you can’t truly know someone until you live with them, and yes, this assumes that you haven’t lived with one another until after marriage, an ancient concept that is losing steam).
The first question that needs to be asked and answered honestly is: Do I love myself?
Until you honestly love yourself and accept every imperfection as perfection, you need to stay away from all aisles not found in grocery stores. You’re not in a position to marry. No one says that when young, starry-eyed kids/children/young adults/old adults announce that they are getting married. This is non-negotiable, and you should pay through the nose until you accomplish this goal. You can’t fully love another until you love yourself.
There are no general classes for sharing lives with others. Not that I know of, other than some religious based classes, but I can’t comment on them, as I haven’t engaged. I think there should be some curriculum that addresses the idea of self-esteem, being a part of a marriage/team/relationship. Just my thoughts as I end my tour of duty working with children 6th thru 11th grade. What I’ve seen has been staggering, enlightening and humbling. I think it's worth paying for sooner rather than later.
Your thoughts?
posted by Andrea | 1:35 PM
2 Comments:
my thoughts?
that just depressed me...
*sigh*
Hey, I see u got your sideroll working alright. Yay!
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