Last Day of July

As is so fitting, the best things come at the end. Because my birthday falls at the end of July, I tend to celebrate the entire month;). Today, in yoga, I experienced one of the most fascinating poses...yes, the headstand.

As you well know, I've been abandoning fear and all, and decided to give it a good shot, face out (for all of you who actually practice yoga). This means that I had to kick my legs up and go for it.

Well...I did it. I made it up and all on my own. The headstand is one of the most coveted poses, as it is known to turn back the clock (that I should care) and rejuvenate the soul.

Well, let it be known that I did just that.

Yea me!

Fear Experiment

I've written about fear a few times, and I wanted to share a recent finding as it relates to fear.

I'm conducting an experiement, and instead of allowing fear to grip me, I become more aware if the initial feelings: the increased heart rate, the shortness of breath, the tensing of muscles. When I experience these sensations, I relax the tightened muscles, I force air deep down, past my lungs and into my diaphragm, and thus reclaim my breath and this automatically slows my beating heart and I am no longer fearful.

HOWEVER, as I sat in my parked car yesterday with all windows down (it was hotter than hot)with the keys out of the ignition, a huge dragonfly swooped over the top of the car. I had a clear view of it as it passed over the open sun roof top.

I remembered my experiment, as my body went into flight syndrome. I searched for my keys...I'd just had them, where'd they go? My not so little friend turned and thought it over as we stared at one another. I found the keys and pushed them into the ignition and prepared to start the car and roll the windows in one fell swoop. I relaxed my muscles, regained my breath and I remained calm. And it flew away.

Happy Birthday To MEEEEEEEeeeee

Today is my birthday...all of 24, so I guess a golden birthday (smile!). Every year is a golden birthday when your birthday is 24/7! I truly love the numbers in my birthday. I always have.

Anyhow. Today got off to an odd start. I was attacked by a dragonfly. No, it was not a dream, hullicination or a result of a hang over. It was real. And the bastard wanted a piece of me. It started when I lifted the garage door and went back into the house. When I returned to the car and attempted to walk around the back of car to get to the driver's side, and there my nemesis just kind of floated. Hoovering, daring me to walk by it.

What was I to do? Go back in the house? WTF, It's my birthday and I had things to do. So, yes, I went back in the house. But for just a moment. I procrastinated long enough to let the dragonfly leave on its own...peacefully. I didn't want any trouble and I never want to kill anything on my birthday (just big talk...it had me running scared).

So. I went back out and there it was...looming. I walked around the front of the car (manuvering between bikes, spider webs and odd boxes all alike!) jumped in the car and quickly powered on and shut all the windows. My big FU to the dragon fly. As I backed out, it kept flying toward the car, buzzing and charging...I guess the bug's big FU to me. I let the garage door down, and no, it just could not go down quickly enough. But it never made it in. Instead, it turned its attention to me and kept at me until I left my own domicle.

It followed me for awhile, but turned back, as I was gunning it at 50 mph in a 30...luckily no cops were around, although I planned to pull the birthday card out if need be (or the legs...which ever would work under these cirumstances).

Was it a sign? Does anyone have any experience with this type of thing???? Dragon flies? Yikes! Was it just saying Happy Birthday?!?!?!?

Why Not Listen?

Why oh why don't we listen to what we know to be true, even if it's only a fleeting thought? Why do we put ourselves in awkward situations? Is it really to learn something, or are we all just punishing ourselves? We are all equipped with a sixth sense. It's that part of the brain that works overtime, but yet we ignore it, swatting it away like a pesky fly.

I guess I just wish the messages were always concrete (and loud): "Don't go. Make a right. Leave now." I get those now and then. When they're really strong, I do heed the advice, whatever it is. Most times it leads me out of trouble, just the answer I needed to get through unscathed.

Other times, it's just a whisper and it goes ignored because I didn't want to hear it and the situation that ensues is more than sticky.

Okay, so here's a promise to the eight of you reading this blog, I'm going to listen to that whisper, before it becomes a roar, and remain clean, not sticky. Wish me luck!

Food Fetish

I am one of those quirky people who must have something green with just about every meal, although, I do cut myself some slack during breakfast-- I do, however, make a wonderful spinach omelet. My obsession with green things is long standing and more a habit at this point.

That's to say that on a good day, I'm known to ingest a zucchini and spinach omelet for breakfast, a huge salad for lunch and pecan crusted salmon and broiled asparagus (or sauteed spinach) for dinner. Yum!

Of course, on a bad day, things look more like this: green tea (maybe)and a handful of pecans and grapes for breakfast, chicken and black bean burrito and margarita for lunch (cilantro and lime count), and perhaps dinner which can be anything, probably sushi or pizza and a dirty martini (blue cheese stuffed olives just to make sure I get the greens in!)

Any other food fetishes out there?

Fear of the Unknown

How often have you heard someone say, "_______ (fill in the blank), is my greatest fear realized..."?

If you release yourself from fear, do you then release yourself from all maladies and secure perfect health and long life? If so, are all maladies just manifestations of fear?

I know...sounds very chicken and egg, but these are the thoughts that keep me up at night when I should be sleeping. Instead, I'm using the light from my cell to write down my notes and ponder life's answers.

So fear...let it go. Goodnight!

Are Leaders Born or Made?

This is a question I pondered frequently when I worked in corporate America. And oddly, I’m still confronted with it, so I thought I’d address it head on. I think it’s up for debate, but I have strong feelings one way, as you will soon read.

There are a lot of people who are put into positions of power and leadership and sometimes it’s unwarranted. I almost believe that people need to go through a battery of tests to determine if they are psychologically capable of leading others. Some people will do whatever it takes to be seen as the “boss.” Those are the people I take issue with, and yes, I do take issue with you.

These are people who will run around proclaiming, “I’m the boss,” as if this statement alone brings value to who they are as individuals and is more than a simple title. Leaders on the other hand, never proclaim, “I’m the leader.” The last time you heard that was back in the day when you played follow the leader—someone had to be the leader in order to play the game. And the more aggressive person usually became the leader—as an adult, probably a boss. The kid everyone nominated to be the leader, truly was, and probably still is.

Bosses bark orders and expect all to follow (or else). Leaders lead and inspire. They know and have faith that others will follow. They have done the background work to ensure their own success. Unfortunately, not everyone can distinguish the not so subtle difference between the two. Bosses tend to believe that a title: Principal, Manager, Director, VP, President, CEO, etc. means that they are some how omnipotent and thus untouchable. They falsely believe that they alone know all the answers. Their egos grow so large, that they ostracize themselves from those that can actually help them, and thus the saying, the bigger they are, the harder they fall. And that’s not a fat joke.

Leaders are charismatic, fair, and empathetic while being stern, forward thinking, collaborative and inspirational. Bosses are not. The number one reason people cite for leaving their jobs? You guessed it: bosses. Not the leader of the department/division/company/thought…just the boss.

My guess is that it all boils down to insecurity. Anytime one has to resort to proclaiming to anyone who’ll listen that “I’m the boss,” something’s missing. Namely your self-esteem. You are not your job or job title. That’s why leaders are born. Not made. No one can teach you that. You can’t learn it on the job. It just is.

Just my thoughts…and yours